His Unbreakable Mate(10)By: AJ Jarrett
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CJ disconnected his call with Jayme and seriously considered throwing it across his kitchen. Thinking better of it, he sat it down on the counter and walked out the back door. A light fog rolled in off the ocean, and the sun stayed hidden by gray clouds, a wet and dreary day. It was as if the weather fed off his emotions, crying in frustration on his behalf.
“Damn it,” CJ groaned. He rest his hands on the railing that ran along his back porch and let his head fall forward. He wanted to deny what Jayme had said but he was right, CJ was afraid.
A bird squawked in the distance and CJ pushed away from the railing and walked down the steps and around to the front of his house. He continued on walking, no destination in mind. He just knew he had to keep moving.
Four years. Four freaking years and now he was being asked to not get involved in his mate’s life. What kind of request was that? All he wanted to do was pay off Samuel’s student loans. It was the least he could do since he was too much of a coward to face his mate.
CJ’s strides grew longer, and before he knew it he stood at the sight of where his father’s absurdly large house used to be. All that remained now was a plot of dirt with the beginnings of grass popping up.
Standing in the center of the large empty square, CJ turned in a circle, looking at all that had changed in the past few years. The house was gone. The pack that used to live here gone, his father dead and gone but no matter how many things were taken from this property it still couldn’t erase the memories.
CJ had grown up not knowing his father. He was just a man who came to visit every once and awhile. They were nothing alike, he and his father. CJ had a passion for exploring, living by the seat of his pants, never to be tied down by anything or anyone that was until he met his mate.
“Samuel,” CJ whispered as all the energy left his body and flopped down on the wet and muddy grass.
The memory of seeing his young mate for the first and only time had been seared into his brain on an endless loop that flash behind his eyelids every time he shut his eyes. Samuel had a long and lanky body with the blackest hair and the brightest green eyes. CJ knew the moment he saw Samuel they were mates. The pull to take Samuel and protect him from the rest of the word had him damn near snatching Samuel from his brother’s arms and running away with him. But if he had done that he would have been no better than his father.
CJ wanted Samuel more than his next breath, but he also knew he had to grow up. He needed to become a man Samuel could trust, which led him to agree to Samuel’s brother Jayme’s idea of putting some distance between him and Samuel. At the time it made perfect sense. Samuel needed time to heal from being held as a plaything to be bought and used, and CJ needed time to figure out what he wanted to do with his life.
That had been the excuse he had used, but in all honesty it was because he had been afraid. Afraid of being rejected by the one person he felt any real feelings for. For all he knew Samuel wouldn’t want to be his mate. After all, it was CJ’s father who had tried to destroy Samuel’s life. CJ couldn’t fault Samuel for not wanting to have a constant reminder of a past he’d rather forget hanging around. It hurt, but he could respect and understand that and because of that he stayed away.
Not knowing what else to do, CJ got up and walked back toward the little two-bedroom cabin he had built for himself. He’d done most of the work on the house. It kept him busy, but the project was nearly complete and that meant more free time on his hands. More time to think about Samuel and wish they’d found each other under different circumstances.
CJ had made a lot of mistakes in his life, and at the top of that list was abandoning his mate. But it was for the best. Right or wrong, it was the way things were because really how could Samuel ever love him?
“Samuel, let’s talk about what happened after you were taken from your home?” Aiden asked.
Samuel chewed on the inside of his cheek. It’d been a week since his last appointment and Samuel found himself wanting to share with Aiden. He trusted Aiden and he did want to get better.
“After Collin’s men killed my aunt, they proceeded to beat me.” He cringed at the memory. “I thought they were going to kill me too. I blacked out, and when I woke up I was in the trunk of a car. I dozed on and off for a few hours then when I couldn’t sleep anymore I laid there with my hands bound behind my back for god only knows how many hours.” He rubbed his fingers over his wrist, remembering the ache and burn the ropes had left.